Do you find post-divorce holidays to be incredibly difficult? It can be a common struggle, especially when there are children involved. To help you with the potential aftermath of holiday struggles, let us review five mistakes that divorced families often make after the holidays that you should be mindful of so that you can be sure to avoid them as we wind down the holiday season.
- Not seeking counseling. It can be important for divorced parents to seek counseling for themselves or their children should the need arise. Parents can even seek coparenting counseling to help ensure they are on the same page as their children during this season.
- Overcompensating with gifts. Many divorced parents feel some level of guilt that their children are celebrating holidays in a different way now that there has been a divorce and may choose to compensate by giving lavish or over-the-top gifts. Even if well-intentioned, this can be viewed as an effort to buy love, especially with older children.
- Putting down the other parent’s gifts or traditions. Another mistake that divorced parents can make around the holidays can be to put down the gifts or traditions of the other parent. Disparaging a co-parent can not only hurt your child’s relationship with your co-parent, but can also hurt your own relationship with your child.
- Making the child feel guilty for being with the other parent. Divorced parents also often make the mistake of making children feel guilty for being with the other parent during the holidays and this added guilt can certainly have a negative impact on your children’s emotional well-being.
- Not seeking the advice of your lawyer. A final mistake that divorced parents make after the holidays is not seeking the advice of their lawyer. For example, the holidays can highlight flaws in current custody arrangements and it can be important to talk to your lawyer about how to make any necessary changes.
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